HEALTH - 7 Signs of Coercive Control
The COVID-19 pandemic has caused a surge in domestic abuse incidents attributable to lengthy lockdowns.
More so than ever, victims are finding themselves trapped in a confined space with their perpetrator. In Northern Ireland alone, three women were killed by their abusers during the first few weeks of the first lockdown and, on average, a domestic abuse call to the PSNI is made every 17 minutes. Due to levels of domestic abuse reaching all-time highs on a global scale, it has consequently become known as the shadow pandemic.
Domestic abuse cases have increased under lockdown
One in every three women has or will experience sexual, emotional, physical, or other abuse during her lifetime. This is an egregious and frightening statistic and reminds us of the need to educate ourselves on recognising domestic abuse in all its manifestations. Domestic abuse knows no age boundaries, and can happen to anyone at any time, including students.
Some forms of abuse, including financial, psychological, and emotional, are not talked about as much as physical violence. Victims may not even identify themselves as such. For this reason, many cases of coercive control either go unnoticed or are not recognised because the typical ‘signs’ are not present.
Coercive control is like a psychological form of carbon monoxide: just because you cannot see something toxic does not mean that it is not there. However, thanks to behavioural studies and victim reports on coercive control, the signs are easier to identify and call out.
So, what are those signs?
1. Isolating you from your support network
This is a key tactic by abusers as without familial and communal support, it is all too easy for them to keep you in their clutches. This includes monitoring your phone calls with family or friends or limiting your contact with them. Lockdown has created a perfect storm for social isolation, playing right into perpetrators’ hands.
2. Controlling your activity
From limiting your screen time to demanding to know your whereabouts, abusers become an omnipresent force in your life. This instils a sense of fear and entrapment of victims.
3. Gaslighting
This is when abusers may twist victims’ words until the point that the victim is in a constant state of denial and uncertainty. Gaslighting creates a distorted image of the truth for victims and a stereotype emerges whereby the blame is placed on the victim for being overly sensitive or hyperemotional, rather than the perpetrator.
4. Financial control
Abusers can restrict your freedom of movement and prevent you from leaving the relationship through monetary means. Financial control allows abusers to pull the purse strings.
5. Turning your children against you
If there are children involved in the relationship, they can be used as emotional weapons by abusers. Belittling you in front of them or labelling you a bad parent serve to deteriorate your relationship with them.
6. Regulating aspects of your body and health
This is a crafty form of coercive control. It may be as subtle as monitoring your diet or questioning your choice of clothing. Many may not deem this a blatant form of control.. However, it sets the stage for a greater hold over victims by letting the perpetrator think they have power over them physically and mentally.
7. Making jealous accusations
This is another form of coercive control that is widely overlooked. The green-eyed monster raises its head at some stage or another in any relationship. But when constant paranoia transforms into unfounded jealousy and an anger streak is unleashed, you know it’s time to go.
One positive outcome of the pandemic is that calls for greater awareness on coercive control have been made including the Domestic Abuse and Family Proceedings Bill which can be deemed a landmark piece of legislation for Northern Ireland.
There are also numerous charities and domestic abuse helplines that can help combat this crime and offer support to victims such as Women’s Aid NI. Last summer a group of Irish female artists collaborated together to release a cover of The Cranberries ‘Dreams’ to raise support for Safe Ireland and defeat domestic abuse and coercive control in Ireland. Such efforts are laudable and show that not even a pandemic can prevent awareness about domestic abuse being raised.
Being better informed about the different patterns of domestic abuse makes it easier for students to be able to recognise coercive, controlling, and threatening behaviour as the invisible bruises that victims bear. Public and charitable action, legislative reform and identifying signs of coercive control signify powerful weapons to wield in the long-drawn battle against domestic abuse.
Georgia Stanley is a Law graduate from QUB and is currently studying for an LLM in Gender, Conflict and Human Rights at Ulster University