HEALTH - Impostor syndrome: The Great Pretender?
Jonathan Turner
Have you ever felt that your achievements, such as getting into university, becoming a postgraduate, or passing an exam were more by luck than skill? That this might be discovered any day and you will be found out as a fraud?
You may have impostor syndrome.
It is a self-belief that you have reached your current position by accident, that your accomplishments are fraudulent and are not actually deserved. While not specifically a mental illness, this manner of thinking can contribute to low self-esteem, perfectionism, anxiety and depression. It can diminish your sense of achievement for any successes, attributing them to chance rather than personal efforts.
Trying to maintain this false illusion can result in regular self-doubt and burnout, leading to a downward spiral with a negative impact on mental health.
Although this can be a very isolating mindset, it is actually surprisingly commonly experienced. It is estimated that around 70% of people have experienced impostor syndrome at some point in their life. Even the term impostor phenomenon has been around since 1978.
Indeed, many famous people known for their achievements have described struggling with this way of thinking. From Albert Einstein saying “I feel compelled to think of myself as an involuntary swindler” to Maya Angelou declaring “I’ve run a game on everybody and they’re going to find me out” and Emma Watson telling us “I don’t deserve any of what I’ve achieved”. So, despite a large amount of evidence to the contrary, you can still continue to doubt yourself.
These feelings are especially common in students, often amplified by a fear of failing or frequently comparing yourself to others. This is especially true when you start a new course, job or placement and are adapting to new conditions.
If you have been a high achiever in school this can lead to becoming more self-critical in an independent working environment like university. Many postgraduate students describe experiencing impostor syndrome, as research progression is usually not linear and there are many times where it can be a struggle to get results. These feelings are made even worse by the pandemic, as there is less opportunity for in-person contact with peers. This can increase isolation and give the impression that you are alone in your work rather than being in a course together with other students.
Although it can be very stressful to think this way, it can be managed and you are not alone in feeling this. Realising that it is very commonly experienced and seeing those who have made significant achievements discuss their struggle can provide some reassurance.
As it is a very isolating mindset, opening up and talking about it can help, whether to trusted peers, mentors or via counselling. It can be useful to reframe how you describe your achievements to challenge these false doubts - writing them out and assigning them to your own strengths and effort rather than luck.
If you have recently started a Master’s or PhD, there can be a great deal of pressure to feel like an expert right away when really the course is just the beginning of getting to grips with a field of study. It is very much normal to expect a period of familiarisation and making mistakes is important as you can always learn something from these.
If you have experienced this way of thinking, while it may feel like you are alone, learning more about impostor syndrome can help to emphasise how common it is. Understanding this, talking with others about it and taking steps to reframe your achievements can help build back your confidence and self-esteem.
Jonathan Turner is a Pharmacy student at QUB and part of the School’s Mental Health and Wellbeing team.