Eva talks autism: festive spec
Hi there, its Eva I am back with a special edition of Eva Talks Autism discussing all things festive and Christmassy.
Unsurprisingly given the fact that I’m writing an article about it; Christmas can provide some challenges for those who are autistic no matter their presentation. This article is formatted as a list of three key areas of Christmas that can make the festive season a little overwhelming. And of course, I can only speak mainly to my own experience. This article follows the philosophy that the best way to learn about autism is by providing autistic people the platform to talk about how to best support their needs.
Social events
The festive season is full to the brim with social events, from Christmas dinners, work dos, festive parties. These types of events can create a huge strain for autistic people as there is a greater expectation to socially perform. This may be in environments there are not entirely comfortable in such as bars or in large group of people.
Hopefully, being present with family members during this time is as restorative as possible for autistic people but it can be the case wherein an autistic person may not feel comfortable being fully unmasked and therefore the feel the need to still socially perform around family members.
Further, this even feels a bit icky to say, but even the idea of receiving gifts in front of others can be overwhelming. Whereby you may have to manage your reaction based on the gift and your relationship to the receiver. Having to manage body language, facial expression, tone of voice etc can mean that there are huge amounts of mental computation required, and this over and over again can lead to burnout.
Plus, these extra social events that are present in the lead-up to Christmas can even lead to social burn-out by the time the big day comes. However, when coupled with the extreme change of routine makes burn out far more likely.
Change of routine
It is often joked about by non-autistic people about the limbo that is created during the week from Christmas Day to New Year’s Eve, and how disorienting it can be. Now, for people that are autistic, who often survive and thrive with routines and rituals this can be debilitating and a major disruption to their overall wellbeing. This is probably the main aspect to Christmas that I personally find the most difficult to handle. Coupled with potential burn-out and exhaustion, an autistic person may not have the ‘energy’ to do much but may still feel the need to push through because ‘well, it’s Christmas’.
Food and other sensory stuff
During the festive season it can be difficult going out to eat or even grabbing food in coffee shops for example. Why does everything have cranberry on it!! Safe foods are no longer safe, restaurant menus change, sometimes even with a reduced menu of about 3-4 choices for a main and even some people may feel pressure sitting down to their roast on the 25th.
Another sensory nightmare is present in Christmas shopping. Personally, I dislike city centre shopping at the best of times, but from about mid-November it becomes my nightmare before Christmas. To accommodate myself better I refuse to go into Belfast city centre now and do any Christmas shopping at other shopping hubs like the Abbey Centre.
Also, I love twinkly fairy lights as much as the next person, but the city centre is absolutely filled to the brim with them, with the market lights, lights on Christmas trees etc. This coupled with the already bright fluorescent lights of most shops means the city centre is essentially blinding and this is only made worse by the fact it gets darker much much quicker in the evening and therefore the lights feel even brighter.
Further, Christmas music is EVERYWHERE, and is so LOUD. Coupled with the increase in footfall and the noises and smells that is associated with large crowds. Christmas shopping is a sensory minefield in the city centre for autistic individuals.
Christmas can feel almost engineered to create meltdown as an almost comically anti-autistic holiday. However, there are strategies that can be employed to lessen the strain for autistic people. Attwood and Garnett Events have a great resource for autistic adults and parents/caregivers of autistic children for how to handle this more stressful time period.
Vital strategies such as knowing your socialising capacity, practicing self-compassion and tips on communicating (even with scripts) and advocating for specialised needs can be found using the link below;
To conclude, please be aware if you know any autistic people that this time of year can be really tough, please ask us about how you can best support our needs and please act with kindness. And to any autistic readers, please know you can get through it, the world is not designed for us and it is okay to feel a bit out of sorts, its important to take care of yourself and your needs are important!
Edited by David Williamson.
Eva Sheila is the Head of Events at Queens Radio who recently graduated from her Masters programme.